Letter to My Unborn Child

So a guy from the 1058th GTC loaded this video today: https://www.facebook.com/mbest11x/videos/764067707070232/

Even though I don't know if I'll ever meet you I just wanted to write my thoughts down. This message could also go to Jameson Maser and Mason Rynearson, since I love both of you boys like nephews.

Life changes after any time in a war zone. I came home questioning everything. For longer than I'd like to admit I was angry, adrift, and aimless other than basketball. Basketball had always been my sanctuary, and in a lot of ways it became my confession box and my temple. I threw myself into coaching.

By chance, if not Providence, I ended up at The College of Idaho. Coaching women's basketball was like learning to walk on your hands. Similar to what I'd always done, but completely different. I was never a very good X and O guy, but you were never going to outwork me. I recruited my butt off. I got lucky from time to time as well.

I ended up with some small town girls with hearts and motors that wouldn't stop. They made me learn how to communicate instead of yell. I was a broken man, and they loved me anyway. I let me ego lead instead of my heart when I left. Learn to not do that.

Even though it was time to go, I often wished I could have stayed, but it was time to put into action what I'd learned from them. I hope Libby will someday understand why I danced like no one was watching, because I know every kid who didn't come home was dancing his ass off with me. There's not a day that goes by that I don't smile because of them.

I coached men for a year as a head coach. I did it my way, with only one regret, keeping a kid I shouldn't have - but in giving him a chance he ended his career and left me free of my debt to the game. I've never once regretted leaving coaching men behind. It was time. My assistant coaches will never know how much they mean to me.

I spent the next three years paying back other veterans, as a County Service Officer and a Rater for the VA. I paid back a small portion of my debt to those who'd helped me when I came home. I suspect I'll be repaying that debt until my last day.

But I digress, what advice do I give to you.

Love with your whole heart. If they don't love you back, let them go their own way. I wasted so much time with unrequited love. It's better to be alone than experience the heartache of spending one day pining for anyone who doesn't reciprocate.

Love fiercely your friends. Those who we get to make of our tribe, or accept us into theirs, are owed your loyalty and respect.

Loyalty, honor, duty. These things matter more than life itself if the cause is just.

Liberty, once ensconced in your heart, soul, and mind, cannot be taken from you. I've know free convicts and imprisoned millionaires. Each person's right to live their life as they see fit, as long as it doesn't harm another is one of the bedrock principles of humanity. Help free people, not imprison them.

Family. It is our only hope of immortality on this plane. Nurture your children, nurture your neighbor, nurture your lands. Leave all you meet better than you found it.

Ride for the brand. Whether an itinerant cowboy, enlisted man, or titan of industry, be honest and loyal to whoever is scratching you a check. When it's time to leave, if you've lived and worked with integrity, you can go home again.

Laugh at yourself. No matter how bad of a man you are, there's someone who can end you. Be humble in victory, gracious in defeat. Life, if you're lucky, will give you equal parts of both. Dance like no one's watching when your heart is full.

Be kind. I've had to nurture this, as I'm a selfish person in nature. Work on your weaknesses and refine your strengths. Learn to be honest with yourself about both.

Never stop learning. Read the books wise men cite. Strive to make a better life for your children. Tell them you're sorry when you were wrong. Admit when you're wrong. Hold them to high standards. Try to not let them see how it breaks your heart when they cry. Let them see you cry.

Harvest game with them. Tell them that never once did you kill an animal without a pang of regret. Let them hear your thankfulness in the life of that animal feeding your tribe. Learn to shoot. Learn some men need to be killed. Know some men will never be able to pull that trigger. Pray you never have to.

Don't be afraid to fail. If I never get to meet you I hope someone from our tribe will tell you stories of my adventures. I lived all over America. I found honorable, wise men and women everywhere I went. You'll find whatever it is your heart seeks. Listen. God gave you two ears and one mouth for a reason.

Learn to tell a great story. As humans we honor story tellers in our DNA, for each of us that draws a breath, lives to learn to love, suffer, mourn, and celebrate is a survivor. Treat each person you meet as such.

Know that the way you view your conquests affects your life's path. You'll never regret making love to a person you care about, but to use another is an anchor your soul carries. Never let regret keep you from loving or being loved.

Tell your friends you love them. When you lose them, your heart will take solace or misery in this. Tell stories of your friends and tribe who left this plane before you. As long as stories are told we are immortal.

Use moderation in things that alter your consciousness. Forsake anything as soon as you feel a need for it.

Recognize the beauty of the world around you. Listen to the classics. Read Shakespeare. Go to plays, attend an opera, see a ballet, Visit other countries that your country isn't in the process of invading.

Get to know yourself. Know that noble honorable blood flows in your veins. Advance your family name in honor.